Longing

My days are filled with trying to outrun this longing.  Folding laundry, working, cleaning, reading, blogging, shopping....  I try to stay ahead of the game and if I am busy enough perhaps it won't catch up to me. Perhaps.  I climb into bed weary from the day, praying that sleep will push the longing further away.  Maybe the distance will become so great that it will not catch up to me at all.  I wish.  But, my nights are filled with longing.  My dreams are filled with the void.  The absence.  I beg God for a dream where Tom is present with me, bringing me comfort and the companionship I miss so much.  Instead I am barraged with dreams where I can't find him.  I am trying to show him something and he won't come with me.  I am trying to tell him something and he doesn't listen.  Longing.  My constant companion and unwelcome friend.
Yet even in this I am reminded that God longs for us.  He longs for a relationship with us where he can share with us His thoughts for our day.  Where He can show us His latest creation.  He longs for our presence and our engagement in His life.  He longs for that day when nothing separates us from His face anymore.  Is this grief a gentle gift to remind us that this is not our home?  He longs for you.